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  #1  
12-18-2018, 07:05 AM
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lordsmurf lordsmurf is online now
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Exactly 6 years ago I was laying in a hospital bed, unknown what the future would look like. For weeks, I had slowly been losing control of my limbs. First dexterity, then eventual paralysis. I was losing my vision, and light hurt what little I had left. Internals started to cause issues, if you know what I mean. Test after test had weakened me, especially the multiple spinal taps. Doctors didn't know what was wrong, and as my body was slowly failing, death was still on the table.

So there I lie, alone in bed in a dark hospital room, nothing to do. (The glow of TV hurt my eyes, and I couldn't see it anyway. Plus listening to commercials was more torturous than silence).

Waiting for the unknown.

Patience.

I heard it snowing hard outside that Christmas, but the bright white was too harsh for my eyes. I never saw it. Severe weather that year kept away visitors more than not. My only Christmas gift was a large chocolate chip cookie.

A week later, I heard the nurses outside my room on New Year's, counting down the seconds to a year that I didn't know what lie in store for me.

That was then...

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  #2  
12-18-2018, 10:36 AM
lingyi lingyi is offline
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Prayers and best continued health to you always!

-- merged --

You old blue grouch! There, I feel like I'm back to normal!

Luv ya blue guy!!!
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  #3  
12-18-2018, 12:45 PM
latreche34 latreche34 is offline
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How do you feel now, back on your feet again?
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  #4  
12-18-2018, 05:49 PM
ELinder ELinder is offline
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Every day is a blessing. Sometimes in the heat of the moment it's easy to forget that.
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  #5  
12-18-2018, 06:07 PM
JPMedia JPMedia is offline
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LS I am thankful not only because you are here moderating this site, but because you are patient and willing to help those who seek your wisdom. I believe that anything worth doing is worth doing right, and this sentiment certainly applies to the worlds of analog video capture, restoration, and authoring. Thank you for your work and dedication to this forum. I raise my glass to you, and many more years of learning and mastering this technical art form.
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  #6  
12-18-2018, 10:06 PM
lingyi lingyi is offline
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You better be around for another 50 years so gamemanico can report how his DVDs are doing!
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  #7  
12-19-2018, 10:03 AM
sanlyn sanlyn is offline
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Glad you're able to hang in there for us.
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  #8  
12-20-2018, 02:02 PM
drzapp drzapp is offline
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Many thanks for staying around and helping so many of us.

Having had a very similar situation myself 11 years ago, I'm curious, what was the diagnosis (if one was ever found)?
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  #9  
12-24-2018, 01:06 PM
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Thank you all.

To continue my story...

After my eventual release from the hospital, I continued to decline in health for another 6 months. During that time, the only real improvement was from the e-stim treatments (micro shock therapy) that jumpstarted my nervous system, giving me some nominal control of my limbs again. Aside from that, I was often bedridden, using my 1st gen buggy iPad to visit the forum. I watched a lot of TV that year, daily binging.

That next year, my ability to type returned (mostly quick hunt-and-peck), but little else had advanced. For example, I was still walking assisted, and often in pain. Paralysis isn't something you overcome without nerve and muscle damage. I gave a quick forum update that I could type again, but little else was said, and I didn't let on what all issues I faced.

A year after my health declined, I was finally correctly diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS), and began treatments. Thankfully, due to my location, I'm seeing one of the top specialists in the country (and maybe the world?). He's not just a neurologist, but a diagnostician like House, which is how/why he saw what others had missed.

I still face issues, obstacles to overcome. The most damning aspect of MS, at least for me, is fatigue, and everything caused by it, especially cog-fog. This forum has grown, and with it demand for my input, but I only have limited hours per day where I'm both awake and have the cognitive fortitude to not make mistakes. Sometimes I spend that time here, sometimes I cannot. Hence why it can take several days for me to respond. I do see all posts and PMs within a few hours, thanks to our background queuing system, and I do respond to things that either urgently need my attention, or are so simple I can answer without reading or thought.

For me, each December isn't really about the gift-giving season anymore, but reflection and introspection.

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  #10  
12-25-2018, 02:42 PM
latreche34 latreche34 is offline
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We wish you a full recovery and return to normal routine, In the meantime take care of yourself and don't worry about the forum posts, There are members here who are capable of answering forum questions.
Happy holidays.
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  #11  
12-27-2018, 11:36 AM
ELinder ELinder is offline
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My brother was diagnosed with Parkinson's a number of years ago. There were days before that when just routine daily things like getting ready in the morning exhausted him. Now that he's undergoing treatment it is significantly better. He won't ever find a cure either, but the key is finding a balance that lets you still have a life that's manageable and enjoyable. I wish you further luck in finding your balance.
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  #12  
12-27-2018, 03:10 PM
hodgey hodgey is offline
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Happy that you managed to find what the problem was and is back up again. I got someone in my family with MS, so I know it can be pretty devastating.
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  #13  
01-02-2019, 03:17 AM
Dude111 Dude111 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lordsmurf
Exactly 6 years ago I was laying in a hospital bed, unknown what the future would look like. For weeks, I had slowly been losing control of my limbs....
Thank goodness everything turned out ok!!!!

Your an excellent staff member lordsmurf -- We al love ya and wish ya continued recovery!!

Peace and love to you my friend
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  #14  
01-10-2019, 12:12 AM
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lordsmurf lordsmurf is online now
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As a final thought...

ELinder, that's exactly it. You get up, you use whatever energy you can, to do whatever you can. Sometimes you get a full day, sometimes you don't make it past breakfast. There have been days when I literally woke up, ate some breakfast, and then had to sleep again for another 8 hours.

Treatments help reduce issues, keep them at bay for longer periods, but your life never gets back to normal.

Which makes another good point ... having the condition is bad enough, but the medications also complicate matters. What I take necessitates downtime multiple days per week. Being forced to lay in bed and watch TV (or use a tablet) probably sounds nice, but really isn't. It's frustrating knowing that you can't be productive, especially if you had energy that day. It's not a simple matter of popping a pill and getting on with your day. MS drugs all have nasty side effects right now ---

--- and don't believe that BS commercial for Tecfidera that shows a happy woman hiking and swimming. It does a disservice to anybody with MS, gives the wrong impression to the masses, and sufferers know it's nonsense. Their pills contain harsh chemicals, not pixie dust and rainbows. After watching their commercials, you'd think Tinkerbell would come flying out of your ass.

Anyway, thank you everybody, and here's hoping for a good 2019.

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  #15  
01-10-2019, 01:12 AM
sirbyron sirbyron is offline
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Thank you LS for all you do here and hope 2019 is a great one for you! We certainly can wait on answers. Health is MOST important. Blessings and prayers.
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  #16  
01-10-2019, 05:01 PM
tryagain tryagain is offline
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That's a shame. I have a friend who was diagnosed with ms several years ago, he is now confined to a wheelchair. I don't keep up with him that much any more, so I am not aware of the pain involved. I do recall he was prone to angry, abusive outbursts at times.
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  #17  
01-12-2019, 07:36 PM
drzapp drzapp is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tryagain View Post
That's a shame. I have a friend who was diagnosed with ms several years ago, he is now confined to a wheelchair.
A quick aside- think of it as a PSA for able bodies

When you use the phrase "confined to a wheelchair", it elicits feelings of sorrow or pity for said person, which is usually not what they would like. "Confined" has almost no positive connotations. From my perspective as a paraplegic for 11 years, a wheelchair is not confining, but very liberating. Most other people I know using wheelchairs feel the same way. Without a wheelchair, I would be confined somewhere, literally. It's the wheelchair that give me freedom! It lets me have an active lifestyle, play with my sons and support my family. And it's not like I don't get out of it several times a day. Before I was injured, I probably used that phrase and thought nothing of it. Now, I realize just how wrong it is. Say something like "uses a wheelchair" instead.

And now, back to your regular programming-
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  #18  
01-13-2019, 11:05 AM
tryagain tryagain is offline
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Wow, you can't be serious? When did people become so PC and overly sensitive? Society has become neutered, (oh no, who will this word offend?) afraid someone might be offended if we say the "wrong" thing. Look at all the newscasters/public figures that have been fired/reprimanded in the last decade or so because they used the wrong word, and some person or group, usually one with an agenda, has claimed to be offended.

How can you make the blanket statement about what a certain phrase elicits? Perhaps it elicits compassion and understanding? Once again, someone is presuming what they feel to be true for everyone. You may be too close to the issue to be objective.

I realize you believe you are just trying to "educate" me, and probably didn't mean to be insulting and presumptuous, but really, I don't need advice on how to speak from some guy on a forum, thank you very much. Lived too long, seen to much. Stopped taking advice on how to live my life a long time ago.
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  #19  
01-13-2019, 01:24 PM
drzapp drzapp is offline
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Sorry, did not mean to offend, just educate (thus the use of smiley faces). Change has to start somewhere- I suppose it's not going to be here.
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  #20  
01-13-2019, 01:47 PM
tryagain tryagain is offline
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No offense taken. I am not a snowflake.

I, too, was trying to educate you, and as a reminder that that not everyone sees things the same way. Nor that one way is "better" than another, just because someone thinks it is better. Maybe better for them, as they see it thru their perspective, but not better for all. I try to practice the "tolerance" that is often preached, but not as often practiced.

I try not to correct others, unless it is a specific fact, and even then, "facts" may be in the eye of the beholder, such as "this video capture card sucks!" This may be why I bristled at your reply. I react when others do it to me, and have to restrain myself from lashing out. Enough psychobabble,

No, I am not going to apologize for remarks that MAY offend someone. I am not here to offend, just to (hopefully) politely add to the knowledge database.

Take care, and let's hope this ends the matter. This is a video forum after all, and petty bickering really doesn't add to the value of the forum.
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