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08-20-2004, 11:27 AM
glšnzend glšnzend is offline
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This was in the Washington Post ... the title of the Article
was "Best Come Back Line Ever."

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male
resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch 11:38 p.m. on Friday.
Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public
indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided
to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was
no one around for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in
a phone interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the
side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to
his purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged

"Guess I was really into it, you know?" he commented with evident
embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a
Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience
until Officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

"That was an unusual situation, that's for sure, "said Officer Taylor."
I walked up to Lawrence and he's...just pumping away at this pumpkin."
Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence.
"I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you're
having sex with a pumpkin?"."

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then
looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin? F**k me, is it
midnight already?"
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